I’ve been absent on the blog because of a challenging first few months of 2019.
My case in the welfare system was up for examination, and I had to go through more tests and meetings. Sitting at a table surrounded by authority figures asking me supposedly well-meaning but still scrutinizing questions you could boil down to: “so, you still can’t meet the same demands as everybody else? What’s the matter with you, really?” Pretty awful and probably the scenario I would’ve dreaded the most to find myself in when I was a little girl (or just a few years ago…). Having Chronic Fatigue has triggered every wound I had of feeling not good enough, misunderstood, questioned and belittled: of feeling met by a world that doesn’t fully understand (or truly cares).
It was another stripping away of a layer of defense around my vulnerable inner child. Seen from a higher perspective, my health crisis forced me to stand up for myself; to speak up for that overburdened part of me: become an advocate for her. It forced me to dive into the well within to find another kind of strength, find my fortitude and faith.
I’ve decided to see these last years as a blessing in disguise, as a gateway to the right path for me. CF has “given” me space and time to rest, recover and write a novel, and I’m determined to follow through. Apart from how hard this has been on a physical and emotional level, I am, of course, grateful for whatever support I’ve received: financial, morally and otherwise, down to the tiny spirit-messengers lately showing up in front of my eyes in the form of lots of ladybirds. In Danish, a ladybird is called a “mariehøne” which in English means “Maria-hen” and each time I feel encouraged to keep going (yes, I’ll notice the subtlest of messages:)).
So, and now the tone of this post will shift into a much lighter one, I have just released my debut novel ”What’s the matter with Maria?” YAY!!
You can find it as an e-book on Amazon.com: https://www.amazon.com/author/monakristensen
Or choose your preferred e-book store here:
I’ve made a short book trailer for my novel, you can watch it under “Books” in the main menu at the top of this site.
Here’s an excerpt from the novel’s prologue:
“No matter your current age, it is my heartfelt wish that this humble story will leave your Wonderchild feeling a little less alone. May it replenish that perhaps thirsting or even depleted part of you like a glass of lemonade does a parched throat during a dry spell. This ”lemonade” is made by a carefully created and well-tested recipe. At first sip, it may appear to lean towards the sugary side but taste again and allow it to reveal a deeper, more complex quality; to be balanced out with the sour and spicy notes which life provides us so generously to boot.“
As nature bursts into full bloom, I am one step closer to flourishing, too:)